


Action and Reaction

by zinke



Series: What We Didn't See [7]
Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode Tag, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-03-17
Updated: 2007-03-17
Packaged: 2018-09-17 06:24:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9309362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zinke/pseuds/zinke
Summary: "I haven't been able to reach Sam."





	

**Author's Note:**

> How this got ignored in the episode, I’ll never understand, but I guess the same could be said for any number of things (hence, this series). According to Wikipedia the San Andreo Plant was based on the real San Onofre Plant, located outside San Clemente in extreme southern Orange County. You know, the place where Sam Seaborn was last sighted way back in Season 4? You’d think that, given the circumstances, someone might have tried to get in touch with him or something. Just to make sure he hadn’t started glowing in the dark or grown a third eye. No problem; that’s what I’m here for. 
> 
> Smooches to caz963 for the beta and for getting me back on course; this thing wouldn’t be here otherwise.

“Hey, have you seen Josh?” Donna asked as she swept inside the campaign’s hotel-room-turned-headquarters.

Bram frowned distractedly in her general direction before returning his full attention to the papers in his hands. “Not for a while. Try next door?”

“Thanks,” she called over her shoulder, already on her way into the next room. As she approached, she heard the low, rich murmur of Josh’s voice just beneath the din of activity around her. Donna paused only to knock perfunctorily before breezing through the open doorway and into the suite’s bedroom. 

“Josh?” She found him sitting on the king-sized bed, phone pressed tightly to his ear, looking surprisingly small set against the avalanche of down quilting and throw pillows. Upon seeing her standing hesitantly in the doorway, Josh raised both his eyebrows and index finger in a wordless request. Nodding in return she folded her arms across her chest as she leaned against the doorjamb to wait for him to complete what she presumed to be yet another call of complaint about the campaign’s lack of public response to the present crisis.

She did find it strange though, that Josh wasn’t saying anything in reply. This was usually just the kind of challenge he loved getting swept into: proving once again to the world that he was right and everyone else was unquestionably deranged.

“Damn it.” His voice startled her out of her reverie just in time for her to see him end the connection with a violent punch of his thumb against the phone's keypad. After tossing the device carelessly onto the bed beside him, he looked up at her with a mixture of anticipation and trepidation in his eyes. “Did you do it?”

She gave him a tight smile. “Didn’t have to.”

“Really?” he replied, relief coming off him in palpable waves.

“Really,” she said, feeling her smile relax as she allowed herself to share the sentiment. “Should be on the wires within the hour.”

“Excellent.”

Taking in Josh’s haggard expression and hunched posture, Donna wondered if there was something more than just the San Andreo situation occupying his thoughts. He was obviously concerned about the political ramifications—how could he not, knowing what he did about Vinick’s involvement in the plant’s origin, and with there only being three weeks until the election? But she could see something more, something darker behind his eyes that was enough to give her pause. 

“More press requests?” she asked in what she hoped was a casual tone, inclining her chin slightly in the direction of the phone he’d discarded just a few minutes earlier. 

“Hmm?” He dragged his eyes up to meet her gently questioning gaze, and then looked back at the phone lying face down beside him on the bedspread. He was silent just a beat too long before responding carefully, “No. I told Bram to stop taking messages from the networks. We’re going to lose the environmental lobby if word gets out about how much paper we’ve wasted since this thing started.”

Donna quirked an eyebrow at him. “I’m pretty sure the environmentalists have got bigger fish to fry right now.”

Her sense of unease grew when he failed to pick up on her attempt at humor. “Yeah.” He sighed heavily as he turned awkwardly to retrieve his phone. Running his thumb slowly over its display, Josh studied it intently for a long moment before dialing again.

Donna watched him nervously as he raised the phone to his ear; she was certain now that there was more to his self-imposed isolation and subdued mood than simply wanting to escape the mounting pressure from his staff and the Party. She just couldn’t quite make out exactly what that ‘something else’ was, and didn’t want to risk making him defensive by asking him pointed questions he wasn’t ready to answer. Instead she watched curiously as he stared blankly ahead, no doubt listening to the repetitive, tinny ring on the line as he waited for whomever he was calling to complete the connection. “Damn circuits are still busy,” he muttered in frustration before dropping the offending device into his lap with one hand while rubbing insistently at his eyes with the other.

“Josh?” she prompted softly, watching him with thinly veiled concern. 

Finally he met her gaze—and she was immediately thrown off-balance by the deep worry lining his features. “I haven't been able to reach Sam.” 

Her stomach dropped heavily at the sudden guilty realization that, in all the night’s excitement and confusion, she’d completely forgotten about their friend. Flopping down to sit beside him, she replied weakly, “I didn’t even think... Is he in any danger?” 

“Probably not. He’s living well north and east of the plant, outside Anaheim. So as long as the winds hold…” Josh shrugged self-consciously. “It’d just be good to talk to him. You know, to be sure.”

Donna nodded and gave him what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “Yeah.” Turing to look at him, she took in his uneasy expression and couldn’t help the rush of warm affection that coursed through her. She should have known he’d be doing this, berating himself for not being able to do more. Placing a hand on his arm, she offered softly, “I could help you try and reach him?” 

Josh studied her face for a second or two before giving her an unconvincing but appreciative smile. “Nah. Short of diverting a military comm satellite, there’s no way I’m getting through to him anytime soon.” He dropped his gaze to study the carpet at his feet as he added quietly, “Thanks for asking, though.”

Feeling helpless, Donna found she had nothing more inspired to offer him than an empty platitude she knew he’d see through in an instant. But she said it anyway, unsure if it was to allay her own discomfort—or his. “I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about.”

Josh scrubbed a hand over his face and blew out a breath. “Yeah.” And with that, something changed. His posture straightened, his features smoothed—it was as though a switch had been flipped somewhere inside him. Gone was any trace of his fear, leaving behind the confident façade of Joshua Lyman, implacable political operative. She couldn’t help but feel a bit dismayed by the change; over the past few months he’d given her so few glimpses of the man she knew lay beneath the carefully cultivated persona, and with each tantalizing peek she was coming to realize just how much she’d truly missed the intimacy they’d once shared.

“So, who had it?”

Shaking her head slightly, Donna forced herself to follow his lead, pulling her thoughts back to more familiar, professional territory. “Naomi from The Post.” She studied him for a long moment before adding softly, “I have to admit I was relieved.”

“Hey, even we have to catch a break every once in a while, right?” 

“Josh,” she couldn’t help it. She had to know. “Why’d you change your mind?”

He looked decidedly uncomfortable with the question. “I told you why: a picture's worth a thousand words, and that picture? That one would have been worth ten-thousand.”

“And it was really important enough for you to risk losing your job?”

“What?”

“You didn’t clear it with the Congressman, did you?” 

Standing abruptly, he smoothed a hand over his wild hair while studiously avoiding her eyes. “I wonder if they’ve gotten any word on the second team’s progress,” he said while making a beeline for the television in the next room.

“Plausible deniability.” Donna watched with satisfaction as her words brought his flight to an abrupt halt “It wasn’t worth the risk, Josh.”

Wheeling on her on her suddenly, he replied explosively, “What the hell was I supposed to do? Let the single best chance for us to win this election slip away? Because if you think today was a disaster, just wait until we’ve got a pro-nuclear President in the White House; we’ll have one of those things in every state before the end of his first term!”

Donna fought to keep her expression neutral. “After today, I think Congress may have some reservations about approving that kind of energy plan.”

Seemingly oblivious Josh continued to rant, gesticulating wildly and pacing the room like a caged animal. “World leaders are busy hammering out nuclear non-proliferation treaties and scrapping Cold War weaponry and it doesn’t goddamn matter! With those things sitting in our own backyard, our enemies aren’t going to need weapons of mass destruction. All it’s going to take is one man cutting a wire or overloading a circuit.” Finally spent and breathing heavily Josh slumped back down beside her on the bed before turning to look at her with pleading, haunted eyes. “I had to do something.”

“Something that could have cost you—?”

Josh cut her off. “He would have disagreed with me. He would have ordered me not to do it.”

Suddenly everything snapped into focus, and she could have kicked herself for not recognizing these all-too-familiar demons of his sooner. “And you didn’t want to put him in that position in case it backfired.” 

He shot her an inscrutable look out of the corner of his eye before hedging awkwardly, “I...don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Reaching out, she wrapped her hand around his bicep to ensure she had his full attention before she told him firmly, “What he’d—we’d—never recover from, Josh, is losing you as campaign manager.”

At her touch, Josh’s eyes snapped to hers, his brow furrowing in consternation as he struggled to digest her words. He fidgeted uncomfortably but held her gaze for several long seconds before dropping his eyes to his lap and whispering coarsely, “I just…I wish I could get through to Sam.” Picking up his phone, Josh began to restlessly flip it over and over.

Donna’s eyes tracked the perpetual motion of his hands, recognizing it quickly for what it was: an outlet for the frustrated, nervous energy she knew was coursing just beneath his skin. There was a time, not so long ago, when she would have known just what to say to him to dispel it. But he was a different man, and she a very different woman. More than that, though, who they were in relation to one another had changed—was still changing, and not only professionally. At times like these, it left her feeling at a distinct disadvantage. “Sam’s a smart man,” she offered lamely, wincing even as she said the words. “I’m sure he’s fine.”

“Well, I’m glad you feel so confident about that,” he snapped. 

“Josh,” she said, plucking the phone from his restless hands and dropping it beside her on the bedcovers, just out of his reach, “you can’t protect everyone all the time, no matter how much you may want to.”

Josh blinked rapidly, and Donna could have sworn she saw the specter of untamed flames in his eyes. “Trust me,” he croaked, “I, of all people, know that better than anyone.”

“I know you do,” she whispered thickly, reaching out to take both his hands in her own. Smiling feebly, she added a moment later, “You may be the only person I know who actually wishes he could be in the wrong place at the wrong time.” He gave a weak chuckle and squeezed her hands in silent gratitude. She watched him intently, her eyes tracing the familiar lines of his face as she willed him to look at her. When he didn’t, she gave his hands a reassuring squeeze of their own. “That doesn’t mean that the people you care about don’t love you for it, though.” She didn’t quite realize the magnitude of what she’d said until she felt one of Josh’s hands shift in hers, followed a moment later by the heady sensation of him threading his fingers slowly through hers. Donna’s head snapped up, and she found herself anxiously searching his face for reassurance about what the gesture meant.

Josh’s expression, however, revealed little. Instead, he gave her a patented lopsided grin as he replied with measured resolve, “And that doesn’t mean I’m going to stop wanting to try and protect the people I care about.”

She met his eyes and felt her heart skip a beat at what she saw there. She wanted to look away; the old familiar patterns may have been frustrating, but they were also comfortable and safe. This moment, gazing openly into one another’s eyes, was none of those things. Donna felt a familiar fluttering in her abdomen and automatically chastised herself for it; this was what she’d spent the last year trying to forget. Yet as he continued to gaze at her, his eyes shining with a depth of feeling she’d seen before but never allowed herself to fully acknowledge, she found herself not caring about pride or any of the other empty excuses she’d been living on these past long months.

Her eyes still not leaving his, she returned his smile with a goofy one of her own. “Okay, then,” she whispered. “Just so we’re clear on that.” Leaning in quickly before the moment was lost, she brushed her lips slowly across his stubble-roughened cheek before rising from the bed. “Why don’t you go tell the Congressman the good news; I’ll see if I can get through to Sam.” Turning to face him, she held out an expectant hand while shooting a significant look to the opposite corner of the mattress. 

Without complaint he leaned over, extending an arm across his body to retrieve the discarded phone. With a grunt he rose to stand as well; then took her outstretched hand in his, set the device in her open palm, and curled their tangled fingers securely around it. “‘Kay.”

Donna watched him amble slowly out of the room, a tiny smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. It wasn’t until he’d disappeared fully from view that she set about dialing Sam’s number and put the phone to her ear. 

 

*fin.*


End file.
